Stay in college ... for as long as possible

By Aaron Sagers
MCT Campus

Allentown, Pa. — For many of you still in college, it’s time to return to the cramped apartments and cinder-block paradises that is college living.
No doubt, as you pack up, you’re hearing
nuggets of wisdom about the future. Well, it’s only been a few years since I finished my undergrad career, and have a crucial piece of advice that takes precedence over everything else:
Don’t ever leave!

Avoid the real world for as long as possible - it’s highly overrated - and just stay in school. It’s nice to get a regular paycheck and I dig my job, but I’d trade it in to be on campus idling away time with beer, deep conversations and ultimate Frisbee.
There will never again be a time in your life where you can spend an entire night at a diner discussing politics, obscure Brazilian film directors and the underrated
merits of The Avalanches.

Sadly, deep - and deeply silly - conversations aren’t a constant in the world outside of education. In school, you’re in a group atmosphere and naturally up-to-date on all things cool; you are constantly exposed to fresh ideas and experiences.
Outside of school, you “talk about your day” - and if you’re especially hip, you’ll catch on to Gnarls Barkley three months after everyone is done listening to them.
Enjoy the three-day week schedule, endless summer vacations, and month-long holiday rests. Like waking up at 1 p.m. on a Tuesday? Yeah, that won’t last forever.

As a student, you know what you need to do - work hard, study, turn in assignments on time, get good grades. As a worker in the real world, the grade system is traded in for meetings and memos. Granted, there might be other ways around this. It’s conceivable that you can graduate college and not trade in sunlight for fluorescent lights. Those are all options, but take my advice, kids: Just stay in school.