'Race Wars' is a more appropriate title for George Lucas' politically incorrect ‘Star Wars'
OK, George. We got the joke with Jar-Jar. Haha. You think black people roam around in swamps; you're under the delusion that we're slaves, we speak bad Engrish, have big ears, long tongues, and we're fairly worthless. Ha. Ha. Ha. We figured it out, so now you're trying to make it seem a little less obvious with the new “Star Wars” films.
Here comes another brother, the only one in the galaxy. He's one of the strongest Jedi. Can you guess who it is? That's right! Mace Windu! Big Black Buck! Angry Black Man. He always looks so pissed off. Why can't the negro be happy, George? Why can't he be happy? Is it because he's the second strongest Jedi and the strongest is a 2-foot tall balding Muppet?
Windu is the second strongest and he kicks ass with his grape-flavored lightsaber. You've got blue lightsabers and yellow lightsabres and green lightsabers and red lightsabers, but the only brother in the stars got a purple lightsaber. Like the brother needs to be anymore distinguished. Is Mace supposed to be a target, George?
It could have been worse.
I suppose your first idea was a watermelon-flavored lightsaber—green handle, pink blade and black spots swirling around it. But if you were a Sith, and you saw an angry negro coming at you with a pink glowing blade with black spots swirling around it, what would you say? You'd say nothing at all ‘cause you'd be damn confused.
Later on we get the token wigger Anakin Skywalker trying to become the only brother in the galaxy. I think you have “Highlander” and “Star Wars” mixed up, George. There can be more than one. But not in your world. Anakin cuts down Mace and then turns into—Darth Vader—the baddest, blackest brother in the galaxy. Think about it. Angst-ridden and whiny little Anakin Skywalker puts on some ebony and is the Baddest Brother in the galaxy! What are you trying to say, George? Black people abuse their position when given power? We can't just be normal?
What about Lando Calrissian? Oh, hohoho. That's right. The man who lives up in the sky, wearing a cape, who is surrounded by things and people alabaster colored. Have you seen Cloud City ? White people and White clouds up away from everyone else, isolated from everyone else. There's so much symbolism there, it's frightening.
Lando sold out to Darth Vader. Lando saw him, with the voice of James Earl Jones and thought to himself, “Oh, my, gawd … another brotha … there are two! And he's so much blacker than me! I need to give this man all my money and Han Solo.”
No, Lando! It was a lie! He's a crinkly old white man! Don't fall for it! But Lando does and gives Vader Cloud city. And things went from bad to worse.
What about the original Star Wars? There was a black man in there.
He was alive for all of three seconds. He was flying an X-Wing. You know what happened to him? He blew up. Something slammed into him. Kaboom!
Did the brotha put rims on his X-Wing? What, you're saying it's not the rims, but the fact that your X-Wing didn't come with blasters? Someone sabotaged a brotha's ship! Who did it? Who? I know who—all those people dressed up in white, running around beating and killing people. That's right. The KK ... err ... Storm Troopers. Yeah. Yeah that's what they are, Storm Troopers.
Star Wars? No. It's more like: Kick The Black Man While He's Down Wars. |
